Why hello there young fella'

Well hello all, I haven't seen you in quite some time. It is currently 2327 and to not die from sheer boredom. I have decided that I would write a blog.

And of course why would I write anything about something that matters? No, I have to write about love and life and how they hurt so badly sometimes. I know they tell us to be thankful, because it could be a lot worse, but it is a matter of perspective I think.

So I've been been listening to my favorite 'love' music, the Kooks, and it just reminds me of how low life actually can get. I was listening to this song and it is stuck in my head. I know some people pick songs that are similar to their life to listen to, but this song found me and everything about it is true in my life.

What song you ask? The name of it is: Brooklyn by the Kooks. It just makes me sad is all, I don't want to say that I have been depressed, but I think that I have for a long time. Yet I lie to myself, I put on a show for others to seem normal when in actuality I don't think I am at all. I keep thinking that there's something else out there, something grandeur something exquisite but there isn't.

Love is the closest thing we have to magic. Yet so many people are sad magicians or worse, they haven't found true magic. True love.

More ties, and lines of myself are being cut. Its like no matter what I do, no matter what position I might find myself in, I can't. I simply cannot. All my life trying to understand, all of my life trying to hold a hand. All for nothing, all so I don't have to feel like shit every morning I wake up.

Waiting for love isn't an option, finding one isn't either. What am I left to do?

The girl I'd give up anything to be with, is with someone else.
The girl who I thought wanted to be with me, is with someone else.
The girl I could see myself with, is with someone else.

Three very different girls all whom I wish to be with. All who will really never know my true feelings. All because they live away from me currently. I just wish that I could see you, any of you, and kiss you and have you know that I do love you, and I'd battle anything and anyone to defend you and be with you.

I'm no gangster of love. Nor a knight in shining armor, nor the prince you've been waiting since you were a schoolgirl to sweep you off your feet. I'm just me, and I can't be good enough for you, no matter how hard I try, how hard I wish I could.

I need to stop now, before I fill this hole with my love angst and persecution.

Goodnight all

(So far so good for the very first blog post)